Im not being unrealistic nor am I being judgemental. But there is nothing more painful that being cheated on by the guy of your dreams and fairytales. How you find out becomes irrelevant! It is what must drive you now. First question is whether you let him go or you fight for him. Heaven knows that it is hard to find another man and groom him and teach him to be the ideal lover for you and the charming head of your household. You search bible scriptures looking for strength and you seek advice from your girlfriends, who tell you to kick him to the curb, you guy friends tell you that he is pushing you arounf because he knows you will never leave him. At this point I had two options. Leave him or Fight for him. Sulking is not one of them. All men hate a woman who sulks and who nags.
I am a beautiful, smart, loving and fertile young black woman. Ngiyasonta futhi ngimulisiwe. I submitt and am giving, polite and respectful. But at the end of the day, I am not going to marry myself. I chose to fight. I wiped my tears and channeled the inner whore within me. That part of me that I always put away because it is improper if I don't get my man back in my arms after this then at least I would have his respect for i fought a good fight! I had to generate an emotion greater than love, greater than trust and greater than sorrow... This emotion is called hate. Hate from thoughts of him kissing you with lips that he has probably sucked her pussy with. Hate fro, Hate from sleeping on sheets that have her cum on them. Hate from his car smelling of her perfume! I plan to blur all lines and go out with a bang.
It was a Tuesday night, we were just chatting and going on like normal and when he asked what I was wearing that I remembered the porn links id stolen from his phone. I played along with the phone sex. He sent me a picture of his penis and I told him I love it and that I will suck it forever because it tastes so good. Im sure that is what he wants to hear. I took my deo bottle and took a picture with it between my breast with a text saying... this could be you. He called me and in this husky voice, "tell me you want me" and I did this with a moan as I touched my nipples. "touch your breast for me baby" I did this... "Afuna wena sthandwa sam" I said, "How hard your nipples" and I breathed in heavily, "Very hard baby!" He told me to wet my fiingers and carass them slowly, just like how he did it. I did this and felt the tingles slowly release from my spinal cord and arose tiny bumps on the sides of my waist and at the same time spasms curling upwards from my toes to meet generously at the core of my womanhood. My back arched... The rest is history... Slept like a baby that night.
